There comes a time when we wake up from our fantasies, our prolonged affair with daydreaming, our escape. A time where we fall harder into our reality with tears gelled on our eyes - not quite ready to fall because if it does, the floodgates will open. A time where the nothing is multicoloured and holds one colour, a solid one with no shades. I call it truth.
Such moments remind me of how far I've to go to correct the half-baked, yet lavishly celebrated ideologies I was born into, and in many ways trained to be and think - with and without my permission. And since I cannot change the birth of this narrative, I must change how it ends. Adapting every minute, reformulating every hour and recreating each second. That is the price I have to pay if I want to dine with my future self.
Moving from country to continent, changing from fire to ice, divorcing manufactured love to be with the raw form of the very word. Staying to fight for what is right, not what I believe should be right. Laying myself down at the altar because self sacrifice is demanded for the next journey. There is no wrong or right way to any of this, only respect for such vigor.
A time comes when we've given it our all, tried our best and we still fail with very colourful colours. But that is where we find our true selves. For that place somehow brings us assurance in our abilities, respect to our mental strength and a renewed emotional intelligence. It's like a test you will never master but one you will always improve on. Isn’t that beautiful to think about? You owe no-one a score sheet. You simply keep improving and hitting the restart or next level button at your own pace. You suddenly evolve to understand that the sky and sea are big and deep enough to fit us all – to forgive us still – to teach us more – to love and accept on us endlessly.
So be like the sky and the sea. Be big and deep enough to show up, show love, give forgiveness, say yes, say no, let go, stand still, fight through, stand up. And my favourite, be quiet. Silence is very powerful.
Before I go, remember this: none of us has the blueprint to life so don’t be deceived by what the books and podcasts say. There is no "one size fit all" and no two people will ever have the same exact story and success route. NEVER. But we'll all have the same exact parts to the story: the beginning, the middle, the end. How each of those books are shaped is what we should all spend our time on. (let's be real, our stories can not fit into one chapter, sometimes a whole book is needed for one part ^_^)